My life confuses me

I am the only person I know who has to make the kind of choices I have to make.
I got a check today for 317.00
With that I need to get all my laundry soaps, dog food, garbage bags, etc, etc, etc.
I also need to pay my rent, by a new pair of shoes, and another pair of pants, put gas in my car, and pay my phone bill. I have to get that paid otherwise the two jobs that I am getting will have no way of getting ahold of me. I have to put gas in my car to be able to get to drug testing and work and all that kind of thing, I need to have another pair of pants because I am down to three and one of those is a pair of very beat up sweats. I had to buy laundry soap and all that because I have to be clean and so do my kids. I had to buy pet food because the animals have to eat.
Do you know how much this leaves me to pay on the rent? Nodda. I have applied for an emergency grant, and I am going to go to Volunteers of America tomarrow to see if they can help me with clothes. I need to make some kind of payment to electric bill because moo moved out and I need to have electricity. It is in her name at the moment. But won't be very soon.
This is not good. All I can hope for is that my landlord will work with me and give me just a tad bit more time to get this months rent paid.
As for Billy I don't know where he is. It is 10:49 at night he said he would be here between 7 and 8 pm.
I took down the other posts because I feel like I am jinxing things. I really like him and he says he likes me. He says he is moving in. A dude. I am confused. He is a big boy though, and I we aren't together officially so I can't even yell at him when I do see him. Men are idiots. And so am I. No wonder I get treated like a whore. I am one.