Okay I talked Jen into NOT moving in February, I just really didn't think it was a good idea.
I called Billy and discussed it with him also and he agrees with me. It would just be to tight. The money wouldn't be there. We need quite a bit of that green stuff to do all that needs to be done to do this thing the right way. The last thing I want to do is rush it and end up fucking it up!
Once I get to Missoula I plan on staying there for quite awhile and I plan on having all my ducks in a row when I get there and keeping them in that damn row for as long as I live there or anywhere else I might decided to live in my lifetime. I am very much done with screwing things up. My kids need stability, all of them. Although Pan doesn't want to go with me. She really wants to stay here with her friends or family members. I don't really know what to do when it comes to that, seeing as she will be 16 before I plan on leaving. I think she is old enough to know what she wants to do and to know where she wants to live. She wants to ask my sister Vicki if she can live with her. I really don't know what response she will get. Vicki has never offered, so that makes me think that she either hasn't thought about it, or she has thought about it and decided she didn't want her neice living with her. I don't know which it is, but I do know I wouldn't blame her for not wanting the responsibility. Especially of a bratty teenager!!!!
Although I know she could handle it because she isn't the type of Aunt who has ever put up with any Bullshit from her neices. I don't really want Pan to ask her. I want Pan to want to come with me. And I certainly don't want anyone thinking I am leaving Pan behind. I just don't want to push her into going somewhere she doesn't want to go. Although I would really like her to try it at least for a little while. At least to come to Montana with me and see what she thinks of it.
I guess only time will tell on that.. We will see . We will see.
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