Friday, September 25, 2009
Well its been interesting getting to know Jim all over again. Its been fun and scary. I am so much in love with him and yet I know I need to guard my heart if I am a smart girl. He is just coming out of a very bad marriage and is gun shy. We really didn't intend for this to happen so fast like this. Just can't seem to control how close we feel. He really didn't want to jump out of the pot and into the fire. I told him to think of me as a cool glass a water instead. I am having a hard time with all the woman he talks to, if they where just friends I wouldn't have a problem with it,. but these are women who are sending him gifts and mooshy cards and want down his pants. These are women who are out to get him and he loves the attention so keeps it going.. Whatever, I don't fucking like it and no one said I had too. I gotta say as much as I love him and want him in my life I don't want to feel used either, or like chopped liver. I don't know if I can do this. Its just not working.