Well, Billy did call me last night from Vegas, Shocked the shit right out of me!
I told him that I am moving to Oregon so that the girls can always be close to their father. That I didn't think it would be fair to them to take them away from the area again. That they need his side of the family too. I told Billy that he is more then welcome to come to Oregon if he wants too but I am not going to Alabama or anywhere else. I have made enough mistakes this past year chasing one dream. The dream died and now I need to get back down to earth and do whats right by my kids.. I told Billy that I had lost my focus, on what was most important to me. My kids, I love my kids more then I could ever love any man, but I forgot that for awhile. I let him now this and he agreed with me. Told me I was absolutely right. We had a long conversation. I told him I hope by the time I am ready to move over to Oregon that he is ready to come home from traveling about the country, I understand what he is doing because I would be doing it too if I could. But the fact remains he is getting older and he needs to settle down, He knows this, and is almost ready, I told him I didn't think I was loved enough by him. He had never loved any one enough to settle down, why would I ever think I would be so special. He told me that I was though. I guess we will find out. Because I am going where I am going, and I am doing what I need to do for my kids. I can always live in Montana after the kids are grown and have their own lives to be living. Which really isn't that long from now. I want to spend all the time I can with all of them before they run off to travels of their own design.