Thursday, July 21, 2005


Thankyou so much everyone who commented to my Dilema post. I appreciate so much the advice and questions to ask myself. I have decided to just let sleeping dogs lay where they are.
If I get involved I will do it all the way. Cuz I am just not a half ass kinda girl.
Not to mention everyone telling me to stay away. I do believe that is exactly what I wanted and needed to hear/ read. I needed to know that it is okay for me to keep tp myself, to think of how it would effect my children. I am not a bad person if I stay out of her life.
Love does not get switched off like some sort of switch. It remains, it always will. For the good of my sanity and the safety of my family. S will just have to figure things out for herself and her daughter.
I will pray for her. Please for her too. This is just so sad. I need to change the subject now to something that really pissed me off today.
My daughter Pan, who is 14, put something that vibrated on my arm. I looked at her, she showed me the object. I grabbed it away from her and asked her where the hell she got it. She told me she got it from the 12 year old neighbor girl A.Pan said that A got the "pocket rocket" from a man named Bob who lives on this street. I said " excuse the FUCK out of me!" She said " he and his wife Bev live next door to Ju****. Okay, so I tell myself. This could be a lie so calm down and don't do anything before you go running around with this machete ready to hack of some poor mans penis.
So the M's got home from the lake and I went on over across the street to ask them about it.
Dad M had no clue what I was talking about so we went in the house to talk to Mom M and A.
A said that she got the "pocket rocket" from Bob. As a late birthday present. Dad M. said okay. My jaw dropped. I heard it thud on the ground. I went numb, and got all warm and not in a good way.
I said A." Do you know what that thing is?" She said " yeah, you put it down there." and she pointed. I got dizzy. Bobs life has been flashing before my eyes ever since that moment. I said ."Dad M what is Bob doing giving something like that to a child?" What the hell?
He isn't doing anything, ANYTHING. He told A she couldn't go over there anymore unless Bev was home. He didn't even ask her if Bev was home when Bob gave her the damn thing.
I am irate. I can't see straight. I want to go over there and kick his balls so far up his ass he will never retreve them. I am not going to call 911. I am going to go down and see a friend of mine at the police station tomarrow though. Just to let her know what is going on. I cannot, will not. Stay out of this.
I have children who live on this block too. I don't have to stay out of it.

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